Questions to ask Care Surrogacy Mexico

Searching for the right surrogacy program and ultimately, the right surrogate takes time and research.  Trust me, I've been there.  As you consider your options, ask questions from the list I created below.  Keep records of the program’s answers to help you make your final decision.  

I put this list together based on my own research as well as the constant changes in the reproductive world.  

How long has Care Surrogacy Mexico been in operation?  *Keep in mind that CARE as a company has been offering surrogacy services in other countries for over 10 years now. 

How does Care recruit surrogates?

What medical screenings does Care perform? Does Care test the surrogate and her partner?  *My surrogate as well as her family went through a series of screenings that Ivan Davydov; Care Surrogacy Mexico's Reproductive Attorney, will discuss with you. 

What is the cost? What is the fee payment structure?

How are surrogates’ expenses handled? Is there a cap on these expenses?

www.surrogacymexico.com






Does the program offer psychological screening and counseling to all parties, including the carrier’s partner?  *My surrogate met weekly with a therapist. 

Where will the IVF and medical procedures take place?  *My egg retrieval was preformed in Mexico City.  My son was born in Tabasco, MX. 

How many babies have been born through the Care program? 

Will there be a detailed contact between the surrogate and myself?

Can I be present at the birth of my baby?

What type of legal counsel is offered to us and to the surrogate?  *Ivan Davydov will cover this for you. 

Does Care offer adoption finalization services, if needed?

If the carrier does not get pregnant over a certain number of cycles, what is your policy? *This is a very important question to ask, as Care has designed a unique policy for the Intended Parents. 

If the carrier has a pregnancy loss, what are our financial obligations?  *Please keep in mind that miscarriage can happen in all pregnancies.  Natural and surrogacy related.  

Is the cost more if the surrogate has a multiple pregnancy?

Does Care have a registry for the surrogate and the child to exchange information when the child reaches maturity? *I keep in contact with my surrogate.  This of course is up to both parties.  

May I speak with a few current or past Intended Parents?  *I am available to chat with all Intended Parents interested in building a family through Care Surrogacy Mexico.  You can reach me via email and Skype.  


www.surrogacymexico.com 

Advice I Gathered on Sperm Optimization for Surrogacy

Being from Pittsburgh and having many friends in the medical field has it's benefits.  Due to my APS and re-occurent miscarriages I sort of became a regular within the Maternal Fetal Medicine department at Magee Women Hospital.  Some of the most skilled doctors in world have taken the time to explain the in's and out's of pregnancy, infertility and blood diseases for me.  I was chatting with my doctor the other day regarding my surrogacy experience as well as male infertility and was surprised by some of the evidence and advice he shared with me.  

Men can improve the health of their sperm and future baby in just three months.  It takes 80-90 days for an immature sperm cell to grow into a mature sperm, men have the opportunity to positively impact the quality of their sperm by improving their health during the three months before fertility treatment.  (So…if you and your partner are considering surrogacy this is great prep work for you).  Men can optimize their health and the health of their sperm through improved nutrition, sleep, exercise and stress management.  You should have regular visits to your primary care physician as well in order to identify and treat other health issues including: hypertension, obesity, and diabetes.

Synthetic testosterone actually decreases sperm count.  Synthetic testosterone, which can be found in supplements, tricks a man’s body into thinking that it has produced enough testosterone and therefore it slows down sperm production.  During fertility treatment men should avoid all supplements and never have a testosterone injection or use testosterone creams or gels before and IVF or IUI cycle.  (This actually comes from personal experience.  The doctor may need you to give 2-3 samples of sperm if it is not adequate). 

Sleep could be the secret to improving everything from eating habits to endocrine health.  While you are sleeping, your body is busy recovering from the day’s physical and emotional wear and tear.  Sleep is also imperative in regulating hormones, including testosterone and other factors for sperm production.  Sleep is vital to improving your health.  Sleep deprivation, which is typically less than six or seven hours of sleep, can lead to:

*       Increases Weight Gain

*       Increases Stress

*       Increases Hunger

*       Increases Cortisol

*       Increases Abdominal Fat

*       Decreases Muscle Mass

*       Decreases Testosterone

*       Decreases Fertility

Smoking today can affect your children tomorrow…I have written about this in previous articles.  Quitting smoking may be the single greatest change that a patient – male or female – can make for his/her own health and potentially for the health of his/her unborn child.  Most people are aware that smoking has far-reaching consequences.  Smoking tobacco or any other product has a dramatic negative effect on sperm count, quality, motility, and most importantly the genes incorporated in the sperm.  There is a great deal of literature available on the dangers of smoking when it comes to issues of reproduction.  http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK53022/

It is important that both partners support each other in quitting smoking.  This single change will not only improve their fertility, but will also improve their overall health and the health of an unborn child.

Caffeine can rob you of energy.  In order to ensure that caffeine does not diminish sleep quality or quantity, avoid caffeine after lunch.

Male and female fertility patients should limit their caffeine intake throughout the day.  The doctor that Care Surrogacy Mexico works with actually advised me of this before I began the egg stimulation process.  Male patients should consume no more than 300 mg per day, and ideally that is more like 150 mg. 

Sources:

http://www.upmc.com/pages/default.aspx

Center for Fertility and Reproductive Endocrinology-Pittsburgh

The Role of the Surrogate Mother

Surrogacy is first and foremost about sacrifice, both for the surrogate and the intended parents. The involved individuals sacrifice physically and emotionally for a common goal; to bring surrogate babies into the world. 


Surrogacy is an emotional whirlwind, for everyone involved.  Arguments happen, feelings get hurt, and things do go wrong.  It is important that everyone looking into this process understands what can happen and how to overcome a bad situation. 


This process is not something that is right for everyone, be they potential surrogate mothers or intended parents.  For many, the emotions involved in this process are simply too overwhelming.  Simply recognizing this fact goes a long way.  Infertility and surrogacy are not easy journeys. 


They are rough and extremely time consuming roads to follow, but the rewards are wonderful.  At the end of the road is a beautiful child that many people have helped into the world. 



Many of you are curious about my relationship with my surrogate mother.  I met her before the egg transfer but had no contact with her during the pregnancy.  I received weekly/bi-weekly updates about the pregnancy and her health from Care Surrogacy Mexico and the doctor.  I was with her in the hospital for the birth of my son, Luca and visited her during her recovery.  We now stay in contact via email. 


She will always have a huge piece of my heart.  Without her I would not have the greatest blessing in my life.  One day when Luca is old enough and is curious about how he came into our hearts and the world I will bring him back to Villahermosa so that he can meet the woman who gave him life.  It's important to me that he knows about all of the people that helped make is journey a possibility.  After all…Villahermosa is where he spent the first 4 1/2 month of his life.  

Can I take my baby swimming while in Villahermosa?

While the weather in Villahermosa is ideal for swimming year round that doesn't mean that it is safe for your new baby.  

Recently an IP (Intended Parent) asked me how soon he should wait to take his baby swimming?

I did not take my son swimming while I was in Mexico.  Yes, he was with me outside at the pool.  I never took him into the water for good reason.  

Firstly, Luca was born 6 weeks premature.  Considering his fragile immune system I was not going to disrupt anything.  His pediatrician advised waiting at least a few months before taking a baby into a swimming pool.  A baby's body temperature can quickly change so the temperature of the water may be too much for them to handle properly.  It is best to wait until your child is at least 3 months old and of course has had his/her necessary shots.  There are also many harmful chemicals in swimming pools and bacteria that are not safe for your precious newborn.  So to be on the safe side, keep the swimming to bath time. 

My opinion on the heart wrenching Thailand surrogacy story...

Before I begin I want to make it clear that this is my personal opinion on this devastating situation.  

I have been following the story on the Australian couple who did surrogacy in Thailand since it first came out.  If you are not aware of this please read http://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-28654831

From the moment we made the decision to embark on the surrogacy journey my heart was in it for the long haul.  Regardless of the circumstances I went through on a personal level after receiving the news about a positive pregnancy test with our surrogate.  My whole world was now about my unborn baby.  

Here is a couple that went through the surrogacy process, just like I did.  Signed a contract, paid the fee, received weekly updates and ultra sounds, and flew to Thailand to watch their babies be born.  And in the end decided to leave their baby boy who was unfortunately born with Down's Syndrome, a congenital heart condition and a lung infection.  This baby boy is the same exact age as my son Luca.  His name is Gammy and he is precious.  I cannot imagine ever leaving my son for any reason whatsoever. 

Doesn't he deserve love and a chance like his twin sister?  It's not his fault he was born this way.  These things happen.  They happen in natural pregnancy, not just surrogacy.  Gammy needs his sister now more than ever.  The 21 year old surrogate mother now looks after Gammy as well as pays for his medical expenses.  She also has 2 children of her own.  There is an online fundraising campaign to help cover his medical fees.  If you have anything to spare please help this little baby.  http://www.gofundme.com/bxci90

I want point out that United States has very strict surrogacy laws.  Mexico does as well and continues to put laws in place that protect the child.  For example, if an intended parent left the country or refused to pay the surrogacy fee the baby would be sent to a Mexican orphanage and put up for adoption.  It would not be the surrogate mother's responsibility to look after the child.  There are also legal repercussions.  The same thing would happen if; God forbid, an intended parent left a sick baby.  

When deciding to have a baby take time on making your decision.  You will be responsible for someone else's life.  Someone else's feelings and well being.  You are not just a parent for 18 years.  You are a parent until the day that you die.  Surrogacy is a wonderful option for serious couples who want to have a baby…their own baby.  It's sad when people like the Australian couple cast a negative spark on surrogacy abroad.  

This was the most difficult article I have written on surrogacy thus far.  As a mother, I cannot seem to wrap my head around why someone would be so cruel to an innocent baby.  Please send Gammy prayers and healing vibes. 

Why choose Surrogacy? Part 2

I am going to talk about the elephant in the room…male infertility.  Yes, fellas you can be the cause too.  Male infertility is due to low sperm production, abnormal sperm function or blockages that prevent the delivery of sperm.  Illnesses, injuries, chronic health problems, lifestyle choices and other factors can play a role in causing male infertility.  Before embarking into surrogacy you will need to be sure that your swimmers are up to the challenge.  Like I mentioned before in previous articles…there are specific tests you will need to determine the quality of your sperm.  

There are several things you can do to guard your baby making tad poles…


Wear boxers if you are trying to conceive.  Tight underwear or pants can do some damage by squishing a man's parts or increasing scrotal temperature.  Skip the hot tub and sauna.  
Exposure to the high temperatures in saunas and hot tubs can heat things up down there, 
and if the temperature of the testicles gets too high, it can kill the sperm and interfere with
sperm production, potentially resulting in low sperm count and motility.



Laptops can be harmful Considering laptops can get hot enough to burn your legs, men may want to keep them away from the private parts too.  There’s evidence that just like in hot tubs and saunas, the heat from a laptop can raise scrotal temperature, which, again, may interfere with sperm production.  If you’re trying to conceive, you may want to keep the laptop on a table or desk just to be safe.

Be aware of cell phones Some experts have linked cell phones to a range of problems, including brain tumors, cancer and infertility.  Studies have shown that it can lead to higher levels of free radicals in sperm samples, possibly decreasing the quality of those swimmers.  Experts suggest men keep cell phones out of their pockets and off their belts.

Age does matter While women are constantly being warned about the difficulty of conceiving as they get older, it turns out that even though men can (and regularly do) father children well after crossing the senior citizen mark, male fertility does decline with age.  According to research, sperm production decreases in men after age 40 and certainly, after 50.  Still, unlike women, who undergo menopause, men can conceivably conceive well after that.

Stress is a fertility killerWhile you might not be surprised that your lifestyle plays a role in fertility, you might not realize how large a role stress plays in both male and female fertility problems.  For guys, stress can lead to impotence, erectile dysfunction and even shut down the hypothalamic-pituitary-testicular axis...all of which can interfere with fertility.  While it’s next to impossible to avoid stress completely, it is important for you to work on managing your stress, especially if you’re finding the whole getting pregnant thing...well, pretty damn stressful.  Try daily stress-reducing activities such as going for walks, exercising, meditating or just sharing some laughs.


Being overweight will not help your future family  
Adopting a healthy lifestyle will certainly boost your chances of conceiving.  Plus, obesity in men is associated with decreased sperm count and quality, and excessive weight may also be associated with misshapen sperm, which can interfere with the sperm’s ability to reach and penetrate the egg.


Source: http://www.mayoclinic.org    http://www.webmd.com/default.htm

What to expect at the U.S. Embassy for your baby's passport appointment.

I write this article from my own personal experience with the U.S. Embassy.  CARE Surrogacy Mexico has clients all over the world so this article will only be helpful if you are applying for a U.S. passport for your baby.  

You MUST bring your appointment invitation with you.  You will receive it via email.  You are not getting past the first guard without it.  You will also need your passport, CARE Surrogacy Mexico contract, baby's birth certificate from Tabasco, shot records from pediatrician in Tabasco, any if all hospital info when your baby was born, passport application, passport photo of your baby…(do not wait to take the picture at the embassy.  It's a mad house there and your baby's eyes must be open or they will not take or accept the picture.)  There are many photo places around the U.S. Embassy in Mexico City you can do this and not be rushed).  Your birth certificate, marriage license if married, divorce decree if divorced, photo copy of your driver's license, copy of wire transfer to CARE, any email correspondence is helpful as well. 

Get a file folder that is secure to bring with you.  This is a lot of important info you will be carrying with you.  

If your appointment is scheduled for 8:15 a.m. you should arrive at least one hour prior to that.  There will be security lines and people tend to jump a head of you.  Don't be afraid to wave your appointment invitation around to get the guards attention.  Everyone else does. 

Do not bring a laptop or iPad into the embassy.  You can bring your phone; however, the guard will give you a ticket number and take your phone.  You will receive it once your appointment has ended.  

You are allowed to bring diapers, formula, baby gear into the embassy.  I suggest making 2-3 bottles before you arrive.  Don't try bringing the water.  They will make you dump it out.  If the bottle is already made the guard won't give you a hard time.  

There are vending machines with soda and water if you need more.  

Once you go through the first 2 security check points a guard will escort you to the elevators to the designated floor of your appointment.  No one is allowed to roam around the embassy.  For the ladies…there is 1, yes 1 restroom (1 toilet) and a changing table.  

The embassy's job is to protect this baby so don't be alarmed when they ask you a series of questions.  Over the past 4 years surrogacy abroad has become very popular among Americans.  

I would be very surprised if you received your baby's passport on the first appointment.  I was told by the vice consulate that "the new standard for all U.S. couples doing surrogacy will need to take a DNA test".  Even I had to.  

When and if this happens the embassy will give you a document requesting the DNA test with a list of authorized labs in the U.S. for you to call.  YOU must call the lab, ask them to send the DNA test to the U.S. embassy in Mexico City.  I suggest you have it expedited.  The embassy will contact you when the DNA kit arrives.  You will then go back to the embassy for your test.  Afterwards the embassy will send the DNA kit back to the lab in the U.S. (have this expedited as well) and you will wait for the results.  Again, the embassy will inform you of your results.  If everything is positive and you are in fact the baby's mother or father you will go back to the embassy once more and finally receive your baby's passport.  

I realize this is a lot and trust me it is difficult to do a lone with a baby, but if I can do it so can you.  It's all about planning and following procedure.  Listen to what Ivan (surrogate attorney) and the embassy instruct you to do.  

If you have any questions about this process please do not hesitate to contact me.  I am happy to chat with all CARE Surrogacy Mexico clients.  

Peace, Love and CARE

Carmela